PROPERTY OF
HERBERT YARDLER
(diary, typed on his mother's old typewriter)
Met Charlene at McFrackle's for ice cream. I got a great parking space right out front so that was a good start to the date. But it pretty much went downhill from there. It turns out Charlene is LACTOSE INTOLERANT. She had coffee and I had a banana split, and she looked like being there around all that lactate was making her sick, and it was really awkward because when I asked her on the phone if she wanted to meet for ice cream she said that sounded nice. I mean am I a mindreader?
Will not do this again. Yes, my sister means well but I am a bachelor. I like it that way. I don't need someone nagging me and being all mushy and crying and things like that.
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